Tag Archive: funny


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WORDS by B.C. Lamb
ILLUSTRATIONS by Kiara Skye Lamb

desert1

Every evening

after bedtime stories and sleep tight prayers,

after Eskimo and butterfly kisses,

one last hug and the final tuck

So begin the nightly trips

of fleeting tiptoes down the stairs

sneaking to the kitchen sink;

and upon the consistent history

of this aqueous mystery

my mind began to ponder and think.

 

desert2

So I caught the water wranglers in the act

and I asked my darling daughters,

“Why do you keep sneaking out of bed

to get a drink?”

Looking up ever so innocent and sweet

they spoke in unison,

“There’s a desert in our room, Daddy!”

 

desert3

KIARA: “We get thirsty from the heat.

There is no comfort in our blankets

and we swelter under the sheet,

they are like the sands of the Sahara

scorching our bodies

and burning our feet!”

 

desert4

KeiLynn: “We have to water our camels

that help us traverse the Gobi-like dunes;

they’re parched by the sandstorms

and running on fumes.”

 

desert5

KIARA: “Death Valley resides beside my pillow

where we were chased by a wiley Coyote

and made friends with a furrowed armadillo;

and after she helped us escape the treacherous nip,

we just had to repay her with a kindly sip.”

 

desert6

KeiLynn: “There’s a cactus in the corner

– a Joshua Tree, I think;

it was looking rather wilty

so we just had to get the poor thing a drink.”

 

desert7

KIARA: “We were being monitored by lizards

that claimed to be Outback wizards

that couldn’t perform or do magic tricks

without a few laps and licks;

and they promised they’d be chum

if we would ‘Goanna’ get them some.”

 

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KeiLynn: “There were buzzards buzzing our headboard

waking us up every time we dozed or snored;

at last we made a deal

and they agreed to give up their leverage

in exchange for a refreshing beverage.”

desert9

KIARA: “A sidewinder sideswiped our caravan

making us cross our fingers and toes

as he hissed and emptied our canteens,

then he wound around the bends

leaving us to fetch more precious liquid for our friends.”

 

desert10

At last I laughed and said,

“This desert is unfit!

Perhaps I can spruce it up a bit.”

 

I opened the window

and turned on the fan.

Then I put a small jug of water by the bed.

 

I called the girls

and explained as I was tucking them in,

“The sun is down

so it is nice and cool in the desert.

Your bed is an oasis and this jug is your watering hole.

If you get out of bed one more time

I’ll have to discipline you for being naughty.”

 

 

desert11

With sheepish grins

both girls cried out,

“But Daddy,

………now we have to go potty!”

Lawnmower Man 1

Lawnmower Man 2

Lawnmower Man 3

(Just a note for accuracy’s sake: there were actually 2 scouts that were willing to take the land, and 10 that refused.)

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In this letter, I delve into a bit of what was an embarrassing issue for us: our financial struggles. I am happy and blessed to report – roughly 4 years later, that we have learned a great deal and through a lot of hard work and sacrifice have become “self sustaining stars.” Much of what we learned was from Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace books – which in effect, teach Biblical teachings on stewardship. I wrote about these courses in some detail in prior posts: Financial Peace 1 and 2. We still have a ways to go in accomplishing all of our goals, but are on the right track and have a game plan for success. For any readers that might be struggling in these areas, we hope that these writings might be of some encouragement and perhaps guide some folks in the right direction. Love and blessings to all!!!! = >

The Yo-Dough Bird

Just to be clear; we don’t wish any harm to the “Dodo”. We actually pray for him every day – pray that he get wise or get out of office!

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